If You Receive my blogs by email

This is just to let everyone know that if you were receiving my blog posts directly by email, you won't receive them any longer.  Most everyone that was receiving was on face book.  You can sign up to follow if you wish or you can unfollow if you wish.  I just thought this way was simpler.

Look for new posts on all blogs, except for Beagle Downs sometime today.....

Later,
L

How Do You Measure Your Happiness?

This has been on my mine a lot lately.  How do you measure your happiness?  Do you measure it by the material things you have?  By the amount of money you have in the bank?  Or do you measure it by the number of friends you have? 

Do you truly know if you are happy?  If you are happy, what is it that makes you happy?  Is it knowing that you are safe and secure?  Is it knowing that no matter what your spouse will love you?  When was the last time you were truly happy and laughed all the time or had a smile on your face all the time? 

I would love to see your answers or your thoughts on the subject.  I will answer those questions myself in a blog to come.  As I said, I have been contemplating these questions myself lately. 

Later,
Love, L

Time is getting closer

We are proceeding with the plans for our vow renewal ceremony.  Originally we were going to rent a place to party afterwards, but have decided to use the fellowship hall at the church.  I also have talked to our youth band, "Unchained" and asked if they could play for us.  Makayla agreed.  I'm going to talk to her some more. 

I also want to get some pictures from my mother in law and do a slide show of Norman and I to play before the ceremony.  I plan to order a cake, have punch, coffee, tea, sodas, and some finger foods. 
It may not be a very big ceremony or affair but it is something that we want to do.  We would love for our families to be there, and some have responded.  However, we are also going to invite our church family.  I want this to be a cherished memory for us both. 

I probably won't do much decorating in the sanctuary, but a few things here and there in the fellowship hall will probably happen.  This is going to be a real fancy affair either. Again, though Norman and I are going to dress up, because we did a western wedding before.  I've almost considered doing the wedding dress thing, but that isn't really me.  Anyway, we want all our friends and family to come, and just visit and have a good time and be part of the cherished memory. 

Now I just need to come up with how I want the ceremony and that will be another part complete.

Good night!  God Bless!

My Thoughts after Christmas!

A Family Christmas

We had a wonderful couple of days of Christmas celebrating.  We spent Christmas Eve in Denton with my mom and it was perfect!  There was about 21 of us.  We had a good time, and even though it was raining and cold, we stayed dry and warm.  There was lots of love in the room.  (Found out today that there will be a new baby in this family next year)


We spent Christmas day at my mother in laws and a good time was had by all I think.  I think the final count was some where around 54 1/3 (there should be a new baby in this family next Christmas, too), but not everyone was there. 


There was plenty of food at both places and life was good.  We were the first ones to my mother in laws, and the second or third to arrive at my mom's.  My niece Misty, was there for the day from the halfway house where she is finishing up her rehab.  I am so very proud of her.  She is turning her life around and is serious about not messing up.  I love her a bunch. 

Thoughts of the Future

Norman and I have been praying about what direction God wants us to go and what we need to do.  We have talked of moving to Gunter, TX and living and working on the ranch there with my family, sisters and mom to be specific.  We are still waiting for confirmation of that, and as I've been praying today and reading different things that have come by way of email and blogs that I follow, I'm not sure that is going to be right for us.  Although it would help in lots of ways, just not feeling a 100% about it.  I know that all will be revealed when the time comes. 


What else does the future hold?  No one really knows.  We are not promised our next breath, so how can we really know what God has in store.  We know only that He will never forsake us and that He is always with us, even when we are places that we shouldn't be. But that is a post for my other blog.  


My dreams of dogs and being a published writer, well I don't know if this is the year or not.  Have I given up on those dreams, definitely not, but just waiting for the right sign that I need to pursue one or the other or both.  My teaching degree?  Well I'm still working on that as well. 


Is there anything that I know for sure will happen this next year, yes, I will continue to strive to be the best Christian I can be, finish my recovery steps, study, go to school, and do my best as a mother and a wife.  Is there anything else I want to happen?  Well yes, I would like to find a better place to live, but if it takes a while, I will survive. 


May you all have a great week!  God Bless!

Only Four More days!

We are spending Christmas Eve in Denton with my family and I am so excited!!!  I'm making cookies today for the kids and some of the grownups and I'm finishing up Christmas presents for my husband's side of the family.  I'm trying to make cookies for the kids there too, but don't know if I have enough time with the size of the family on the Farnsworth side, but I am going to do my best.

I haven't been excited about Christmas in about four years.  The stress always gets to me because I can't seem to get everything done that I need to do and I'm so tired by the time it is over, I just pass out....

On December 31st this year, it will have been one year since I've had any kind of alcoholic beverage to drink and I think that is something to be proud of...  It is not that I am an alcoholic, but there were times when I didn't think I could relax without something alcoholic.  However, I made a promise to my husband that when we got married I would quit.  It has taken me a while, but I am there. 

Anyway, back to Christmas Eve... my niece went through rehab this year and has been transferred to a half way house and I will get to see her on Christmas Eve for the first time in about nine months.  She has finally gotten her life straightened out and I'm so very proud of her!!!  She can only visit from seven am to seven pm on Christmas Eve, and I want to get there sometime between ten and twelve so that I can spend some time with her.  I love her very much!!

Anyway, I know we will be a little sad this year too, because this is the first Christmas without my dad.  However we have lots of memories and things from the years that will make us laugh and smile. 

Hey Mom do you remember the year we dropped the ham or was it a turkey taking it out of the oven????  We laughed for hours!  Anyway, I know we will have a good time, and next year we won't have to travel at all on Christmas Eve.  We will all be together.  I can't wait!  I told my husband this morning that next year we are taking the week of Christmas off!!!!

God Bless you all and Remember that Jesus is the Reason for the Season!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!!!  Happy New Year!

Love, L

A Driving Need

I am looking forward to the things that are in store for us next year.  I'm looking forward to a house in a new town, making new friends, and just living our life together.  I'm looking forward to having grandchildren.  I'm looking forward to having beagles again.  However, with everything I'm looking forward to I have a driving need to complete unfinished things and get rid of it before we move. 

What things you might ask?  Well I have at least 5 story lines at different levels that I want to finish.  I have three books, a short story, and a collection of thoughts that I would like to see get typed and finished and hopefully published.  I have several craft things that I would like to get finished and put away and in some cases give away to friends. 

I am also taking intro to algebra which I would like to get finished in January and I want to start pre-calculus and get it finished in no more than three months.  If I am able to get that accomplished, then I can enroll in school and start getting my teaching degree. 

It sounds like a lot, but I do know that I can get this accomplished.  I just have to stay focused and rely on God to give me the energy and strength to get this all done.  I like having things completed and put away.  I like it when we are able to close a chapter, and start a new one and that is what I feel like we are doing.  Closing the old chapter.  Starting the new chapter.  I know it will be difficult for us, but those that are close to us are already talking about coming to visit.  We will have room for a guest or two in the new house.  Everyone will be welcome that wants to come visit.  We will still make the trips for family reunions and Christmas Day with his family.  The rest of the year will be in God's hands and so will our lives. 

God Bless you all!  Love, L

A Couple of Thoughts I wanted to Share

First Thought

My Mom was down here this last week and I got to visit and have coffee with her.  I really miss that!  Hopefully in the next year I will be where I can do that on a regular basis.  My Mom, Julia or Jude, as she has been known most of her life, stayed with my daughter Caity.  That is my daughter's nickname.  Her full name is Lauren Brianna Caitlyn Shipley Woods.  She will get upset when she reads this because if i call her Caitlyn, she will tell me that is not her name, but it is because that is what I had put on her birth certificate. 


Okay so I went off on a tangent, but I'm back.  Anyway, we are going to Denton on Christmas Eve to be with my family.  We drew names this year between the adults except for my mom.  That way, we buy for one person, plus our kids, and then of course my mom.  I wasn't sure I like the idea at first, but it works good and thank God because we cannot afford to buy gifts for everyone nor do I have time to make gifts for everyone, although I am trying, and I don't have to feel guilty for not being able to get family gifts. 

I'm have been married for almost five years and I'm not sure what the Christmas present program is at my in laws.  We have been trying to buy for my Mother in law and Step Father in law, and then we were buying for his siblings, and his kids.  That was not possible last year, nor will it be this year.  Parents are bought for no matter what because without them, there would be no us.  So I am trying to decide what to get our parents.  I have a few thought, but have not fully decided.   I still have a couple of weeks, right????

Second Thought

My favorite things in life are animals, writing, and teaching.  My goal for this coming year is to do all of that and I think it is definitely foreseeable.  My sister, Ann or Julia, or I use to call her Sissy, but she made me stop after I started to school, is about to see her dream come true.  You can read about it at http://www.rememberwhenranch.com/.  She has a place for Norman and I if we want it.  I do without a doubt.  We will have a house of our own, and work if we want it.  I know this is a good step for us.  We will have to move to Gunter, Texas, but I will be close to my Mom, and a lot closer to my daughter and son in law who are moving to Keller or that general area.   Although my husband has said he will move, I feel like he is holding back.  We love each other and I just want us to be happy, not stressed over money or work.  He can work on the ranch there or he can continue to do siding if he wants.  But it would be a place where we don't have to worry about paying rent, or utilities or buying groceries or having gas money.  I have been praying for God to show us the direction we need to go, and I think this is it.  Now I need to pray that He will show my husband as well.  God Bless you all

The Future

We cannot predict the future, and the choices we make in life shape our destiny.  God however is in control of our lives, if you are a child of God that is....  I have been praying for Him to show us which direction to take and what we need to do.  I don't know if this is a sign from God or not, but here is what has happened. My daughter and son in law will be moving after the first of the year to the general area of Keller, Texas.  That is a good 2.5 to 3 hours away.  I don't want to be that far from my daughter, so I have started looking for jobs in that area. 

Yesterday, I came across a website with employment opportunities and they are headquartered in Southlake.  That is not very far from Keller and a heck of a lot closer to Denton than I currently am, and that is where my family is at this time.  With the prospect of grand babies in the next year or so, I've decided to apply for the job.  I told my husband last night, and he said okay.  We have been talking lately about both of us finding jobs that are regular and where they are not contingent on good weather and sunshine.  He has stated once of twice about going back to work in the grocery business.  I told him to do whatever makes him happy and not to worry about anything else.  It is time we thought of ourselves and what will make us happy in the long run. 

We would be leaving behind other family, friends from church and lots of memories, but we would be gaining a new outlook and chance at a life together and not having to worry all the time about money or asking for help from family, who is always there when I need them.  (Thanks Raven and Caity)  Love you both! 

However time will tell with everything, and if that is not the direction I'm sure God will give us a sign. 
Hope you all have a God Filled, and Blessed Day!  Please pray for my job opportunity.  It is something I could be happy with for a long time, and it will give me a chance to complete my schooling as well.  Love, L.

Feels Like Winter!

Okay so on Wednesday I was wearing shorts and flip flops and walking around outside.  Drove to the store with the windows down and the sun was heavenly.  Yesterday I carried a coat to my Mom's and wore it home.  Heat is on, and all the ceiling fans are off.  Two of the three dogs are wearing their sweaters.  The big dog needs a pony blanket, because they don't make dog sweaters for dogs that weigh 120pounds and stand six foot tall on their hind legs. 

Anyway, I have mini muffins in the oven for the dogs all though they smell so good, i might eat one.  ( It's oats and honey flavored)  Okay get a grip!  It is people food, not dog food.  Okay, so we drew names yesterday for Christmas at my mom's.  We did couples and i got my niece and her boyfriend.  I'm not sure what we are going to do for them yet, but I have a couple of thoughts. 

Every time I think about Christmas, or anything like that, I have heart palpitations...  No it's just that I want to do so much and money is tight, and I don't have any place to put a Christmas tree where we live.  I was really hoping that God would provide us with a new place to live big enough I could put up a tree and decorate, but maybe next year. 

Thanksgiving was great yesterday!  Ate too much!  Just normal for a holiday.  Looking forward to Christmas Eve with my family and Christmas Day with Norman's family.  Of course if someone wants to send me on a cruise to the Virgin Islands I won't complain.  Soaking up sun on the beach with temperatures in the 70's and 80's sounds so good today!  But I would miss everyone. 

Don't forget your dogs for Christmas this year!  Go to http://dixiedogtreatsntraining.com  The What's new Page has a link to purchase my dog treat recipe book.  Your dogs will love you forever!..  It's not very expensive!!!  Please share the link and page with your friends. 

May you all be blessed abundantly in whatever you seek!  Have a God Filled Day!  Love, L

Thanksgiving Eve (I know)

Okay, I haven't felt this way about the holidays in years I think..... 

I worked over at the church today and put in 3.5 hours.  The office is closed on Friday, and my husband went to do a small repair job, which if he doesn't finish today, he will on Friday.  I just spent about twenty or twenty five minutes on the phone with one of my best friends, Jean.  She gave me a tip for a job.... I think I will email the lady and see what is going on.  It would be back in relocation, so I'm not sure.  It would depend on the job.  Anyway, I'm trying to decide whether to go ahead and boil potatoes and get everything ready for the potato salad tonight so that all i need to do is put it together in the morning or to wait.  Maybe I'll get my husband to make his cake tonight and then I can do the potato salad in the morning.  I want to get to my mom's by lunch time at the latest. 

Anyway, I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving.  To Family and Friends that read this, I'm wishing you all the best day possible!  May God Bless each and everyone of you abundantly in all that you seek.  Seek His face first in everything you do.  He is always there.  Love you all, L.  Have A God Filled Day!

Timeless Tuesday

Today has been one of the longest days I have experienced in a while.  I miss the kids at school and this afternoon I walked over to see who was there. Only three there Emily, Jara and Laily.  Laily's mom Tracy, and Ms. Melissa.  I wish I hadn't resigned, but it was for the better.  The school doesn't have to worry about paying 4 teachers when there really wasn't enough three year old students for two classes. 

Changing the subject, Remember the song by Cyndi Lauper called Just another manic Monday!!!! That was yesterday.  I know that this time of year is very slow for my husband's work, but I don't quite remember it being this slow last year.  We are better off bill wise, because we have paid my car off, but when you look at everything in the long run, I still need to find work.  I don't want to move... but it may come to that.  We both need jobs that are steady at least for awhile. 

Anyway, it is in God's hands right now.  I've been job surfing all day practically, so much so I have a stress headache.  On a different note, we are going to spend Thanksgiving with my family this year....  I can't wait to play games and laugh and have a good time.  Almost everyone will be there except for my niece Misty, but she is being transferred to the half house from rehab.  I am so proud of her!  And my nephew John.  They are finally turning their lives around. 

I am thinking about maybe offering to babysit or watch a couple of kids after school to see if i get any takers.  It wouldn't be much income but it would be some and with cleaning at the church it will help until I can find something full time.  I'm not even sure what kind of job I want.  I just want to be able to go to school and get my degree.  Maybe I can find something at a childcare facility or something like that to help.  Anyway, I guess that is where we are right now.  If we move, I would definitely want to go the direction that my daughter and son in law are going.  I'm not sure how that will effect my husband's work.  We have to go where there is work.  I  am tired of worrying and not knowing what is going to happen.  Yes i know about giving it to God, but let's face it, that is a whole lot easier said than done.  I pray and talk to God all the time.  He answers my prayers and I know i just have to have faith and trust in the Lord, and i do try to do that everyday, but Monday was my day for a nervous breakdown.  And I had it.

My daughter is a great prayer warrior and we prayed together and all is turning out okay, not great but okay and it will get better.  I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving and that you all are blessed greatly by God in all that you seek.  Have a God Filled Day!

Priorities In Life

Okay after a long talk with God this morning, I've realized that I need to get my priorities straight.  Playing games on Face book, playing solitaire, or doing things that are not productive should not be on that list.  So after a lot of thinking and realizing that money for the next two weeks is going to be very, very tight, I've decided to re-organize things and get a plan together and in place.  Of course, I need God to be at the top of that list, and He is. 

So here are the things I'm trying to accomplish with God at the helm over the next six to seven months.

1.  A closer walk with Jesus and He being first in my life.
2.  An income from my freelance writing and my website to sustain us when Norman doesn't have any work.
3.  To start school.  I had some very unrealistic goals this last week concerning this, so if i don't get enrolled to start by January one, then I'm not going to freak out.
4.  A place to live where, the electricity bill and utilities are not more than the rent.  A place to live where we are not overrun by critters so to speak.  A place to live where the floors don't give when you walk.  A place to live that I can invite my family to spend the night.  A place to live where if I decide to keep kids or provide childcare, I have room.
5.  To plan and pay for our vow renewal ceremony, just the way we want it.

These are currently my priorities.  I have other priorities but these take precedence currently.  Number one will always be a priority no matter what else I have completed or accomplished.  God, husband, work, family, and friends.  Those are the way it is for now. 

May you truly have a blessed and God Filled Day.  love, L

Monday monday!!!

Well Monday has arrived and I find myself at home, taking antibiotics, cough syrup, nasal gel and trying to keep Dooley from stealing my cough drops.  I have a respiratory infection and probably for awhile, but I visited the doctor on Friday and he loaded me up. 

I have missed work since Friday, although I have been writing my income level from that is not enough yet to sustain us on days I miss from work, or to replace my lost income from the school.  I've started inquiring about going back to school to get my teaching certification and my degree in education.  I have thought about being a teacher quite a lot lately because I enjoyed it so much while I was at the Day school at the church.  Before then though, when i was in my twenties i considered it then.  I love history, science and math, and reading and writing of course.  I've been looking at online schools all morning and I will need to do this online since we live so far away from a major metropolitan area. 

I finally finished my dog treat recipe book and hope to get it set up on line on my website for sell.  I'm praying for it to be a hit and make us some money.  That is one of my goals for the day, to get it up on the website and ready for purchase. 

Other than that I'm thinking a lot about the fact that my daughter and son maybe moving before Christmas.  They aren't moving out of state, but they won't be five minutes away.  If and when they move, most of my family will be driving distance of at least two hours except my baby sister and her kids.  What exactly does that mean?  Probably that I will want to move closer to my daughter.  I have already asked my husband how he feels about moving and I was answered with a question.  That is okay.  I know God will lead us to where we need to be and if it means closer to my daughter or my mom, or staying right here, that is what we will do, at least until my grand babies start arriving. 

I guess that is enough rambling for the day!  I have things I need to work on, and information I need to gather.  May you all be abundantly blessed by God in whatever it is you are seeking from Him.  Love, L

My laptop is repaired!!!!!!!

Okay I know it is lame but we have been sharing  a computer for probably almost a month, which is not a big deal when we are both working.  But if he doesn't have any work then he is here at home when I get home from work and alas we both can't get on the computer at the same time.  So he took the computers to see if they could be repaired.  Thanks Honey!  I love you with all my heart!  (My laptop was fixable)

Anyway, his desktop computer is dead.  He's genealogy database was on it so now it is time to rebuild the data base and this time back it up to a disk.  I'm writing again since I'm not working at the school any longer and so far so good.  I should be able to make at least 125 a week, once I get into the swing of things.  I made about 32 in four hours last week.  Not bad, but definitely not going to pay the bills.

Anyway, God is taking care of things and we will be fine.  We drove by a house, but it just didn't feel completely right.  Not ruling it out, but not going to go jump on it. 

Anyway, I hope everyone has a great day!  May God Bless Your Socks off!  as my friend says. 

Love, L.

Amazed

Sometimes I look at my life and I'm amazed and what it turned out like.... I have a wonderful husband, a super daughter, wonderful step children, and a family both by blood and by marriage that I love.  As we are growing up, we all have dreams of getting married, having a family, a house, and much, much more but as young girls and boys, you don't really understand what all that encompasses.  You don't think about the in laws that you get when you get married, or the additional sisters and brothers or if you marry someone that was or has been married before, you get step-children, and in some cases, step-grandchildren. 

Although my relationship with my step children is not anything like I had hoped, I am hoping that God will help us to heal the hurts and have a better relationship this year and the years to come.  My husband and I would both like to be a part of their lives.  I've been praying for healing in those relationships and maybe, hoping it will happen soon only God knows. 

Sometimes, it is very hard stepping in to a family where children are grown and have lives of their own.  For me, it was my first marriage and I guess I really expected more, and it didn't quite turn out that way, probably my fault but I am willing to fix the issues.  Some times our imaginations take over and then when things don't happen quite like we think, we get a little disappointed and I think that applies to both my husband and myself.

I know that God will help us heal any hurts that we may have caused with family.  I'm hoping that family will allow us to make those amends and have a relationship in the future.  God has done wonderful things in our lives over the last year and half.  I'm looking forward to what He has in store for us in the future, but right now I'm happy living one day at a time, doing His will, in His service, where ever that maybe doing whatever He wants us to do.  Have a God Filled Day!  May you be blessed Abundantly in all things you seek, when you seek His face, His guidance, His will and His wisdom.  Love, L.

To My Daughter

When I asked God 24 years and 14 months ago (you were baking for 9 of those, more like 10) for someone to love me unconditionally, I had no idea that He would bless me with someone like you.  You have taught me to be patient, understanding, and gentle.  You have taught me that no matter what we are always there for each other. 

I love the person you have become.  You are beautiful, intelligent, giving, caring and thoughtful.  You are a daughter, a wife, a granddaughter, a sister and one day soon you too, will be a mother.  I hope for you a daughter just like I received from God.  I love that you walk with God, and that your faith is strong.  I love that you have that joy in your heart that only God can place there. 

Over the years we have played, laughed and probably done some things we shouldn't.  I've enjoyed every minute of every day that we have spent together.  Even though there were times when we were angry, we never left one another.  I know it was probably tough on you growing up with out a dad around all the time, but you had something better.  You had a grandfather that loved you as if you were his.  He was so happy the day I told him and Nanny that I was going to have a baby.  He was all smiles.

I know that I have made mistakes while you were growing up, but we learned together and I want so much for you.  I want you to dream big dreams, laugh as much as possible, love with all your heart and know that above everything else, you were a gift from God. 

Cherish every day as if it were you last.  Never forget to tell people you love them, and never let angry words hurt those you love.  You are and will always be, my baby girl.  Love, Mom.

Separating Your Feelings

There are times lately that I have a hard time separating out my feelings.  I pretty sure most of it is because I am going to recovery meetings and it takes you through a lot of self-examination.  During the day, my mood fluctuates so much that I can cry one minute and laugh myself to tears the next.  Are my hormones screwed up?  Probably.  I've needed to go to the doctor for hormonal issues for more than a year.  No health insurance and lack of income stop me from going. 

Some days I feel I have given up a lot in the last few years and I am resentful that I've had to do that, not because I was asked to give them up, but because I had to make some very difficult decisions.  Do I ever wish I could turn back time?  Several hundred times a week.  Would it make a difference?  Probably not. 

But I do have some regrets that have caused a lot of guilt feelings.  The guilt won't seem to go away, and I hope as I travel through on the road to recovery, that they will.  I lean more on God every day.  I find myself praying and don't even realize that I am doing it.  I find myself singing a song in my head from church service on Sunday morning, or from one I've been listening too on the radio at the house.  It's not a bad thing, because it keeps me from reliving things from my past.  It keeps anger at bay.  And I feel closer to God and eventually kind of calm inside. 

The dreams that are happening, I'm sure stem from recovery and having to analyze things from my past.  One or two things that keep coming back to surface is the question about being selfish.  I've never thought of myself as being selfish, maybe I am and just don't see.  I'm sure I could pose the question to family and friends and they would be more than happy to answer.  Oh but am I ready for that part of recovery?  I'm not even sure I'm ready for recovery. 

Okay and just as a reminder, recovery is not just for drug addicts or alcoholics.  It is for people who have been hurt in their past from many different things or maybe because they have other addictions that could eventually harm them or ruin their lives.  So before you look down your nose at someone because they are attending recovery meetings, examine your own past.  Maybe you need to go too!

My blogs

This notice is to let everyone know that I'm removing automatic emails from my blogging list.  If you want to continue to read it, you will need to sign up to follow the blog.  This is not to hurt anyone's feelings or because I'm mad at anyone.  I'm trying to be honest about my life, my recovery, and the way I feel about things and I think this is best so that no one is offended by what I might say.  (This maybe defeating the recovery program!)  Writing lets me get my emotions out and if I'm going to deal with my past and get past the hurts, and my addictions, then I need to write. 

May you be blessed by God abundantly... 

Just Life

Okay, I turned 48 on Monday and today, we are celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary. Life is good. We have a good church home, a place to live, food to eat, and currently we have work. Life is good, but God is Great!

I've had a sinus infection and ear infection since Saturday, and I'm finally feeling better. God is Awesome! My husband and I are planning on singing at church. We've picked out 4 songs and have been listening to all of them. The members at church, (by the way we go to Emory Baptist Church www.emorybaptist.org ) have been trying to get my husband, Norman, to join the choir. He does have a wonderful voice and sings harmony quite well. I'm still a little frightened about singing, but only because without someone to sing along with me, I can't keep the tune, unless it is in a bucket.

We will probably be moving in the next couple of months. We are praying that God will allow us to move back to my house in the orchard. I just want things to be simple again. I think they are on the way, and I'm praying that God will continue to show us signs that we are headed the right way.

Be Blessed! God is Awesome!

Love to all,
L

Its Been A While

Life seems really distant these days. My dad went in to the hospital with pneumonia, and we lost him on February 8th. You never think about losing your parents, and the emotions that you go through until you do lose them. No one that still has their parents understands what you are going through, or what you feel. I know that my daddy is much better in heaven with Jesus, then in a bed in ICU struggling. I know that he is no longer in pain, but those he left behind are still experiencing pain and struggling with grief. I have my good days and then I have those that are bad. Sunday was such a day, and so is this afternoon. I want to hear him laugh. We will all survive and eventually it won't hurt as much as it does right now. I know that in my heart. My mom is very strong, and she calls to check on us girls. I guess you never stop being a parent, no matter how old your children are. You want to make the hurt go away. I do have many, many wonderful memories with my dad. We built a house together. We square danced together and I gave him a grand-daughter that thought of him as a dad. He walked me down the aisle at the age of 44 and gave permission for me to marry my husband. Then a little more than a year later, he walked my daughter down the aisle and I gave permission for her to marry her husband. Today, has been a little strange. I think about what has happened in the last six weeks and feel sometimes like time has been suspended and that things are not really what they seem to be, but then something happens and reality sinks in once more. One thing I know for sure, is that my daddy, our daddy, always believed in us and urged us to fulfill our dreams. He was always proud of us, and was never afraid to show us how much he loved us. There were plenty of hugs and kisses and tickles as we were growing up. I know my mom misses him and they had 51 years together, and one day we will all be together again. Love your parents, honor your parents, and tell them often how much they mean to you. You never know when time will run out and you lose that chance forever.